And then there are the rest of us, who are generally caught in the beginning of our ciminal careers. Like these two geniuses from my hometown:
A few choice excerpts from this real-life, not-concocted-by-a-comedy-sketch-troupe police blotter item:
- A pair of suspected burglars were caught when police followed their footprints in the snow from a Dubuque store's smashed window to a nearby mobile home park.
- A resident pointed out a silver car that became stuck in the snow around the time of the break-in.
- While they were searching the home, police saw Milroy and the juvenile walking on nearby Nightengale Lane.
- Their clothing matched surveillance video from J & J Pool, and Milroy's shoes left identical prints to those discovered near the broken window.
- They also had several unopened packs of Marlboro cigarettes with serial numbers matching a carton from J & J Pool.
- The juvenile told police that he and Milroy were involved in the burglary, according to court documents.
But these two geniuses? They aren't going to carpe the diem for shit. What the hell is happening to this great nation of ours?